And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
