No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
