i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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