i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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