You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize