bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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