I love black thongs
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
