I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
