Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize