Im at strip club and am horny
i just had sex bonerless
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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