He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
