Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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