just tell him i said nine months
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
