ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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