After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize