I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
