Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize