Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
