No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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