I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize