Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
This is the high leading the old right now
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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