is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
