A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
North Korea, Best Korea!
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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