Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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