if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
