Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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