I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize