The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
