it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Randomize
