I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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