There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Randomize
