If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You smell like stripper and shame
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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