I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize
