Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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