do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
