Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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