Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
