It's like God shit irony all over that family
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You ruined the universe
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
