I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
