I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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