Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
