If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
