Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
