Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
