Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
