she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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