uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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