The maid of honor just puked.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
he fucked my hip out of place.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
