So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Dear god my vagina.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
