what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I don't think brook has ever known best
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
