i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
